by J Hutcherson | June 10th, 2006
FINAL 2-1 Argentina: Ivory Coast sends the message that stopping Drogba for long stretches stops them. Argentina reminds everyone that ‘02 was a fluke, at least for the first matchday.
90+ Minute: Riquelme off for Aimar.
90th Minute: It takes a yellow card for Drogba to learn not to throw the ball at the opposing keeper. Go figure. Ivory Coast not up on clock management. Shep, where’s the basketball analogy?
88th Minute: Ivory Coast is pressing, but Argentina is crowding. There’s no reason for them to do anything but absorb. Why risk the counter? Yet another Argentina stop.
85th Minute: Argentina ends up offsides after shooting straight at the Ivory Coast keeper and then stripping the ball back for a walk-in. Lots of excitement, no change in score.
2-1 Argentina: Gonzalez says hello to the home support by getting carded in the 81st minute for what I’m sure he felt was an absolutely vital tackle from behind. Ivory Coast restarts and scores. Care to guess who? Drugba? Yep.
76th Minute: Argentina reconfirms their commitment to no longer worry about scoring by subbing Saviola for Gonzalez.
72nd Minute: Glenn is using the excited voice over nothing, but I can’t blame him. It’s been a long game.
70th Minute: Still Drogba with the all about me baby approach. Shep is yelling for the PK, which I can only assume means penalty. I didn’t see anything that harsh.
64th Minute: Insult meet injury - Argentina just subbed out Crespo for Palacio. Methinks they feel their lead is sound.
62nd Minute: Another Ivory Coast sub, this time it’s Kone in for Boka.
Just got this from Connolly in response to a congratulations email I sent him: Hey J,
I just read your words to the group as we’re in the van driving to Liepzig and I’m on for a sec. I agree with you…they did well.
I don’t know how to put this but I’m kind of a big deal. People know me. I’m very important. I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany.
55th Minute: Ivory Coast figures why not sub, can’t get any worse. Dindane for Kalou.
49th Minute: Yellow card for Heinz after Drogba drops like he’s been shot. Waste of a card.
46th Minute: We’re back. Glenn is reading the facts about Ivory Coast overlay and we have more war references.
HALFTIME 2-0 Argentina: If Ivory Coast can’t figure out how to man mark, this one is already over.
43rd Minute: For reasons known only to themselves, Ivory Coast gifts Argentina a corner. They clear, but the defending is woeful.
39th Minute: Shep with another basketball reference, though he’s right about the Ivory Coast defense.
2-0 Argentina: Saviola scores in the 38th minute. Ivory Coast can press an attack, but they can’t defend.
37th Minute: Shep modestly reminds us that he played for the Cosmos along with some guy named Pele. Another soccer stops a war story. They usually tend to start again. Just saying.
35th Minute: Best chance for the Ivory Coast, but he gets stoned. Shep says “oh baby, you gotta be kidding me!” That’s why he’s Shep and the rest of us are just pretenders.
32nd Minute: Drogba came close to equalizing, but this isn’t horse shoes.
29th Minute: Our first Maradona sighting. We knew he was in Europe after the Italians snatched his Rolexes last week. Unpaiid taxes. Now Glenn is making the NBA references.
28th Minute: Argentina gets a nice run going, but the last pass doesn’t quite connect. Ivory Coast isn’t distributing well, and getting beat badly on the near side.
1-0 Argentina: Hernan Crespo with the opener in the 24th minute off a Riquelme freekick. If that’s how Ivory Coast defends freekicks, this isn’t the group of death. More like the group of mild annoyances.
22nd Minute: Revolving corners amount to nothing.
20th Minute: I’m now half convinced the balll did cross the plan due to the positioning of the Ivory Coast keeper. Please, something exciting happen so I can move on. I’m rewinding this thing like the blasted Zapruder film.
17th Minute: On replay, I’m with Shep. That ball didn’t cross the plane. Then again, we’re using TV angles here that live a little for granted. Now it’s Shep with the baseball analogy. Slightly better than the NBA analogy. Upgrade!
14th Minute: Argentina has a justified handball complaint, then the resulting corner might have crossed the line. Regardless, it’s still 0-0. On replay it looks like it might have crossed. Shep’s hollering ‘oh baby!’ so something happened.
12th Minute: Shep tries the NBA Finals analogy and fails miserably. Corner Ivory Coast.
5th Minute: Shep is in cliche mode and Glenn keeps saying ‘debutants.’ There’s nothing to talk about because nothing is happening. Funny how that works.
1st Minute: It’s the Glenn Davis and Shep Messing show for this one, starting with the Bono special on the Ivory Coast’s political problems. Did Glenn just say “game on” just like I start these live blogs? Meet my new favorite. Then Shep went and ruined it, calling this one “unpredictably unpredictable.” He thought about that before he said it. Sad really.
GAME ON: Too many people think the Ivory Coast will factor. Most of this is down to the need for someone to stand against the usual suspects. Otherwise, we’d all be picking Brazil to win, and the standard account to advance. Where’s the fun in that? Regardless, Ivory Coast is going to need a lot to get a point here, much less get out of the group.
Maybe we get through this one with the expected starting keepers on the field.